By Stephen Horn
Have you ever found yourself tirelessly trying to solve everyone else’s problems, only to realize you’re left feeling drained and unfulfilled? I know I have.
My Career Type is Advisor, and from my chart, I have the two Pressure Functions (Inspiration / Drive & Stamina) Open. So looking back through the years I can see many points in my life where I was operating from a conditioned unhealthy state “trying to answer everybody else’s question/losing focus” and “being in a hurry to get things done to be free from pressure”… and for those who have the two pressure functions open, know the “pressure sandwich” and by trying to alleviate the pressure through action–chaos is sure to follow. The pressure can be very overwhelming, especially if you are just amplifying someone else’s pressure and taking it on as your own. That’s what I did for the first 30 years of my life, took on other people’s problems as my own, and without realizing I was doing this as a way to show people I was valuable–yet another misalignment based on my type which is “let me initiate/build, and show you my worth through what I can do because I am efficient and I can do a lot!’
How I experienced the shadow side in real life:
Example of Proving Value based on Action: As one of three Managers at a Medical Wellness Center, I led the Group X & Programming Department. In our start-up phase, I eagerly took on numerous responsibilities to showcase my skills and ensure my value to the company. With my diverse background and marketing expertise, I managed everything single-handedly, driven by the belief that job security stemmed from the quantity of work I delivered. Despite efficiently overseeing a department of 25 employees and providing continuous support, I was so efficient I found myself working 34 hours a week while being paid for 40. This constant busyness was a result of self-imposed pressure to prove my worth, and operating in misalignment that I was unaware of, I thought this is how life is supposed to be. To give you an idea of how much work I am talking about, upon my resignation to move to LA, I helped the company train my replacements because we had to now divide my original role into three separate positions.
How I Experienced My Two Open Pressure Functions:
Before I discovered the BG5 Business Institute and the BG5 System, I often felt overwhelmed by the pressure to fix everything for everyone around me. I never understood, why I could see the obvious solution, that was not so obvious to them. Whether it was trying to offer solutions to friends’ dilemmas or stepping in to resolve family conflicts, I constantly found myself caught up in a cycle of trying to show how valuable I was, because of my ability to efficiently navigate through challenges, and almost bounce back with ease. But what I was doing out of innocence, was not received well by the other person, so when operating in misalignment I know now that there will always be “static communication” instead of a “healthy broadcast”.
For example, I was with my younger brother, who happens to be a 4/1 Advisor Career Type, and I am still unaware of BG5 at this point. Despite our close bond, I often found myself overstepping boundaries and imposing my solutions onto him without waiting for mutual recognition & invitation.
Unaware of his decision-making strategy (Environmental Sounding Board) and the significance of us all following our unique strategy for our career type, I failed to recognize the harm I was causing (and the confusion I may have caused him). Instead of empowering him, I ended up disempowering us both when I tried relieving the pressure I felt by initiating action. As some may already know, having a “sounding board” decision-making strategy and his Public Role being an Influencer / Authority (4/1), these are folks who are deaf to anyone’s opinion on decisions they should make. The chaos that was caused is like The Switchman accidentally changing the switch points on the railway and the conductor is unaware, not only will the train now be late, but the tracks are not complete on the new track it was switched to. (Yikes)
Another real-life experience was when I started to receive insights randomly for other people. I would often feel compelled to share these insights immediately, believing I was helping. However, I soon realized that sharing insights before people are ready to hear them can be just as detrimental. For example, I would call my other brother, who is a Builder type, and give him insights for him, only to be met with rejection and arguments. Looking back, I realized I had not followed my decision-making strategy, and it was not the right time or place for him to be ready to hear. If he’s not ready to hear, sharing insights out of misalignment is just “static communication” and hearing something prematurely could now cause him to make decisions out of alignment which could drastically change his life.
Now, instead of putting pressure on myself to release my knowledge, I have the wisdom to always go back to my decision-making strategy and ask myself, “Was I Recognized & Invitated” to share with this person, or even start this project? 9 times out of 10 it’s a ‘no’, so now I make notes so I don’t forget the insight and have it safely stored for the right moment when it is recognized and invited to be shared. There is deeper wisdom in understanding my openness, and recognizing when I amplify other people’s pressure leading me to more stress and anxiety. I can now sit with the pressure and not act upon it, and getting up and just walking to get fresh air helps me move the pressure without putting decisions into action.
In the wise words of Ra Uru Hu, “Every time you make a decision, every time you navigate with your mind, you navigate away from who you are.” This quote serves as a powerful reminder of the importance of honoring our true selves in our interactions with others. By embracing BG5 insights, we can navigate relationships with greater empathy, authenticity, and mutual empowerment, fostering meaningful connections and personal growth along the way.
It wasn’t until I discovered the BG5 System that I began to understand the true impact of my openness and how I was operating in misalignment to my career type. BG5 provided me with invaluable insights into the dynamics of our interaction and the importance of respecting each individual’s unique design.
Meet Stephen, a seasoned 6/2 Emotional Projector with over 15 years of hands-on experience in Talent Acquisition and Employer Branding. His approach centres on “Working Smarter,” specializing in crafting and implementing efficient hiring strategies, particularly in the fast-paced and complex worlds of Healthcare and Bio-Pharmaceutical (Drug Discovery) Industries.
Stephen’s educational journey includes earning a Master of Arts in Sports Management from Kent State University in 2015, following his Bachelor of Science in Business Administration (AACSB Accredited) from Youngstown State University. In 2016, he embarked on a transformative journey, covering 2434 miles from Ohio to embrace the sunny vibes of Los Angeles.
In 2019, Stephen stumbled upon the Human Design System and has been on an intriguing journey of deconditioning ever since. Delving into the intricate layers of HD and BG5®, he is passionate about understanding the depths of these systems and integrating them with his coaching practice to help his clients with complex trauma.
Stephen’s life mission centers around spotting and dissolving old community interaction patterns, aiming to guide individuals from reactive responses to more thoughtful, responsive engagements. He is on a mission to shift people from a stagnant status quo to a place of forgiveness, changing the narrative of what’s possible for our world.
